Change is a process

mental note: don't stop the process. change is taking place within you. continue to be consistent and remember that all you have to do is take it one step at a time.

change is a process, not an event. 2020 was hard on all of us. there is not one person, probably on the planet, who was able to leave 2020 unscathed or who didn't have at least a few hard times throughout 2020. whether it dealt with jobs, family, covid, finances or friends, the decade brought in heartache, loss, insecurities, instabilities, and change. there were many changes we never imagined would happen in our lifetime and have made us extremely uncomfortable, but through discomfort comes change.

new years resolutions are notorious for being hard to keep up with, especially when aimed towards health, dieting, restricting, and exercise. no matter what we decide to change - adopting a new, healthy habit, or breaking an old, bad one, they are all extremely difficult. there are setbacks, times when we crave the brownies and ice cream (my personal downfall) and we splurge by eating an entire pan (yes, i have done this many times), but it doesn't mean all of your efforts are completely wiped off the table.

did you do something you told yourself not to? yes. did you for a split second lose sight of the end of the tunnel? yes. did you make yourself feel like you've just completely erased all the progress you've made over the last few weeks? yes.

we need to stop this cycle of believing one hiccup, one setback, one miss step wipes our self-improvement slate clean and slams the door of progress in our face. just because we shift our path slightly doesn't mean the efforts and actions we have made should be forgotten.

real change is not a linear path, it is often one filled with relapses, setbacks, and struggles. the most important thing to remember is these are inevitable and are followed by learning something new about yourself, realizing a strategy you initially thought would help you achieve your goals hasn't so you can now adjust the strategy as you continue on the path to change.

change is taking place within you. continue to be consistent and remember that all you have to do is take it one step at a time.

my new years resolutions for 2021

-explore: whether it's exploring my home town or somewhere new, i want to explore more. i get so caught up in my "routine" i often get stuck with never moving forward and always being in the same place, so for 2021 i want to explore more.

-come down from my "tower" and let my guard down: this is something i will talk more about in the future as it's a very vulnerable and scary thing for me to talk about but here's the overall gist: i have struggled with anxiety and depression essentially my whole life, but more seriously in the last decade since i lost my aunt tragically. i go to therapy/counseling once a week and something she helped me realize in the last few days is i constantly live my life with walls up, in my guard tower waiting for the next bad thing to happen/ball to drop because if i am expecting something bad to happen, when it actually does, it won't be as hard on me as it was when my aunt passed away. (i'll share more about this in the future potentially, but for now, just know it wasn't good). i in no way, shape, or form think this is a good thing (hence why i'm trying to change it), but it keeps me from ever being able to truly be in the moment, from being able to be fully at peace, and from being completely happy.

-love myself first: some of my closest friends know what this truly means to me and it's something i have struggled with my entire life. it is also something i think will be a lifelong battle but again, change is not an event, it is a process. :) y'all have heard me talk about making sure your cup is full first. this is a concept which can be applied to so many things in life and i'll do an entire post on but for now, the short version is you can't pour into anyone else's cup if your cup is empty.

-be more open about mental health: if you have your own struggles you have been open about i'm sure you understand when i say if you open up about it, people will flock to you that are going through similar, if not the same, situations. the more we talk about it, the more others feel a "safe space" to talk about them with you. now, imagine a world where people who were struggling felt they had a safe space to turn to vs turning to dark places to hide their demons - a world where talking about mental health wasn't taboo and instead encouraged so people could work on it and be happy - that to me seems like a much happier, healthier world.

-to be stronger: more on this to come on feb. 7th…. ;)